Episode 133 — The Overwritten Eschatology

— The Divine Realm, Central Administration Building.

"LUMINAAAAA!! Terminate the synchronization! Kill that 'Synchro' link right now!!"

The Chief God’s desk—apparently reinforced with rolls of duct tape after he’d given up on actual repairs—shook violently along with his scream. On the 'Causality Monitor' he was pointing at, abnormal system logs were cascading down at a terrifying speed.

[Warning: External device 'Magic Race Territory' detected. Synchronization with Felsen OS has commenced.]

[Event: 'Ragnarok (The Final Confrontation)' flag has been corrupted due to economic rationality.]

[Processing: Replacing Demon-side 'Hate' with 'Gold Dependency'... Success.]

"Lumina! My... My 'Epic Final Battle' scenario! I spent tens of thousands of years simmering that plot, and it’s been overwritten by a boring 'Trade Agreement'! Look at the Demon King’s army! They’ve thrown away their swords and started writing 'Delivery Notes for Rare Herbs'!"

The Chief God was no longer just taking stomach medicine; he was clutching a bucket-sized container of the Divine Realm’s highest-grade sedatives, shivering uncontrollably.

However, Lumina—the goddess in charge—was...

"Ahaha! Chief God, look at this! Our divine power revenue model has shifted from 'Subscriptions' to 'Platform Fees'! Every time a demon spends money, we get a commission. Passive income is the absolute best, isn't it?"

Lumina had traded her casino owner’s gown for a sharp, impeccably tailored CEO-style suit. She was elegantly sipping a glass of top-tier Holy Water mixed with carbonated soda.

"Platform fees?! This world is my garden! I am the Administrator!"

"No, Chief God, not anymore. The current world is a massive network called the 'Felsen Economic Zone,' centered around the server known as Master Zect. The Magic Race territory is merely its 'external storage.' As for your position... hmm, I’d say you’re a 'Legacy Browser' at best."

"I’m... a Legacy Browser?! You’re treating the omniscient and omnipotent ME as a piece of software nearing its End of Life?!"

The Chief God dropped to his knees in shock.

On the crystal display, the patches Zect had released—the 'Homestead Act' and 'Company Towns'—were shown hardening and optimizing the land of Felsen with cold, calculated efficiency.

"Look, Lumina... the farmers are being lured by the 'Reward' of land ownership, producing food with desperate intensity. That man... he has turned human desire into the very fuel for his system. The 'Rights' he offers are moving the masses far more effectively than any 'Miracles' granted by a god...!"

"It’s rational, isn't it? Miracles have a high operating cost, but a 'Right' only costs a single piece of paper. Master Zect is systematically clearing every 'Bottleneck' in the world’s program, one after another."

"He’s clearing too many of them! Now he’s even integrated the Magic Race territory into his own network! To think my grand Eschatology would lose to that man’s household ledger...!"

The Chief God finally collapsed face-down on the floor.

On the monitors, Zect’s faithful execution environment (Gustav), his processing unit (Argo), and his security tool (Volg) were continuing to update the world on their own, even in their master's absence.

"...What about the Hero? What about Tama...? She was supposed to be the last spark of conscience..."

With a glimmer of desperate hope, the Chief God turned his gaze to the edge of the monitor.

There, lying on Zect’s stomach, was the Hero. She had completely lost her wild edge, letting out a defenseless "Mrrrp..." as she playfully gnawed on one of the buttons of Zect’s pajamas.

"The Hero... the Hero has entered 'Standby Mode' under the label of 'Pet'... Has she judged that the greatest crisis has passed now that the world has synchronized with the demons? Everyone—the Hero, the demons, the world—they’re all being sucked into the gravity of that man's 'Sloth'..."

"Isn't it wonderful? Honestly, Chief God, why don't you give up on all this difficult management and just retire under my wing? The benefits package is incredible!"

"Curse you...!! LUMINAAAAA!!"

While the Divine Realm was rocked by an unprecedented crisis of hierarchy inversion, down in the "Sanctuary" on the surface...

"...Mm. Tama, you’re a bit heavy. Ah... that was a good sleep."

Zect slowly woke up and took a sip of the cola he’d left out.

While he was sleeping, the OS known as the world had successfully completed yet another massive update.

"Meow. (Oh, you’re finally awake. Good job, you shut-in.)"

"Yeah... alright. Three hours until dinner, huh? I guess the world won't end if I squeeze in one more nap."

The King of Sloth leaned his recliner back once again.

Today, the world continued to turn "rationally" and "peacefully," blissfully ignoring the intentions of God.

Volume 5: Governance of Sloth — END

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